One Month Later
I swung my head from side to side, stretching out my neck muscles, as Maverick and I approached the First Year corridor, each of us holding up one end of our hanging platform, carrying it back to our room after using it in another practice session with Larry and Leo. Two platforms were needed for that.
Maverick watched me closely. "How's it feel?"
I grinned. "Getting better. My neck was killing me the first few days, but I'm getting used to the extra weight. We can add some more tonight." I would spend part of our hanging practice that evening with extra weights hung from my waist, preparing my neck muscles to hold much more than my own body weight while hanging. Maverick would do the same in his trainer. We did that every evening, while afternoon sessions were spent in Larry's and Leo's room, with our Second Year friends spotting for us as we worked out some choreography for our "pairs hanging."
I stopped suddenly as we entered the First Year hallway, throwing Maverick off balance. Maverick began, "What..." Then he realized what I was seeing, or not seeing. "Huh."
I frowned. "Yeah. Where is everybody?"
At this time of day, though classes were over, it wasn't unusual for much of the dorm's population to be missing — gone to the gym, or the library, or relaxing in the courtyard taking in some sun... But since the start of the year neither of us had ever before seen it as a ghost town, utterly without sound or movement.
Maverick frowned. "We must have missed an announcement. Or could we both have forgotten a meeting we're supposed to go to?"
I shrugged, wide-eyed. "Let's get this put away," I jiggled the platform, "And start looking around."
We looked in the demo room first, but it was likewise deserted. But once we got within earshot of the cafeteria, it was obvious where everyone had gone. My eyes lit up. "One of the teachers must have been sold!"
Maverick frowned in puzzlement. "Seems like we would have heard about that in the Second Year dorm."
The caf was nearly wall-to-wall boys: it appeared all of the First Years were there, a few upper class boys, more Third Years than Second, and more red "graduate" uniforms were present than I had ever seen in one place — as far as I could tell, all of the living graduates were there. There were clusters of boys around tables with half-filled pizza boxes and cans of soft drinks, and one large knot of boys near one end of the room. I tried to see who the focus of attention was, but couldn't figure it out. I walked into the room with Maverick and tapped a mole named Richard on the shoulder. "Who?"
He quickly swallowed a mouthful of pizza and laughed. "Where've you been?"
"Second Year dorm. Who's the party for?"
Richard glowed at the chance to impart exciting news to someone in the dark. "Gil!"
Maverick and I both gasped. I stared at Richard, my mouth wide open. "You're kidding!"
Richard shook his head. "For real! He's over there. Go say hi." He gestured vaguely with his pizza at the largest knot of boys.
That explained the composition of the crowd in the room. Only a few of the upper-class boys knew Gil, and he or Brian had probably invited the ones who did individually, but no First Year boy would miss a party for one of their dorm parents.
I began cautiously shouldering my way in apologetically, leading Maverick by the hand. Gil's distinctive chuckle stood out above the chattering voices occasionally. At last the way parted and Gil was in front of me, standing with Brian beside him, and several other graduates nearby. Gil was talking to Jack, with Eric, quiet as usual, standing next to him. Gil's face lit up on seeing us. "Hi! I was just thinking I hadn't seen you two!"
Jack gave me some room, and I grinned and gave Gil a tight hug. After I let go, Maverick looked uncertain for a moment, then put his arms around Gil and gave him a squeeze. Maverick would probably never be the hugging type outside of sexual play, but he knew what was expected. I saw Jack giving Maverick his usual skeptical look. Maverick had seen the look as well out of the corner of his eye. Maverick's jaw tightened slightly, and his hand reached out for mine again and gave it a crushing squeeze that told me Maverick was trying not to react any more visibly. It was a sign of Maverick's progress that it had been weeks since Maverick had needed this outlet for his tension.
I was almost dancing with excitement, imagining myself in Gil's place, the hanging he had trained so long for now so imminent. "So tell me all about it! When are you swinging?"
"This Saturday! I can't believe it's so close now. The carpenters and other crew are already supposed to be over at my owner's house, putting up the gallows and my prep tent and all that in her yard."
"Oh, so a woman bought you..." I frowned. "Ummm, her name's not Grace Millan, is it?"
Gil and Brian both laughed. Gil sputtered, "Oh, Wynn, you got Grace at the party, didn't you? I felt like we should warn all you guys about her, but Brian said there was no point, if she wants you, you have to take her anyway. But no, Grace didn't buy me. I'm hanging for a really sweet marmoset lady named Barbara Costman. She owns that chain of clothing boutiques, 'Now Boy,' and she's doing this as a treat for her store managers. And I'm sure she'll invite close friends too — you know how it is. She says I'll have a pretty big crowd to watch me die."
"Which scene are you going to do?"
"Well, I wound up with the 'Runaway Slave.' When I first started looking at scenes I leaned toward the 'Assassin's Execution' thing, but Brian convinced me I didn't look mean enough to be an assassin." He giggled and rubbed his shoulder fondly against his roommate's, who laughed. "Anyway, Brian is going to be my executioner, of course, and I'm taking along a couple of Third Years, Terry and... what's his name, Aubrey. They'll be other slaves, and they'll do all this weeping and wailing when they see me brought back to be punished for escaping. That's a new thing they're doing this year. The Dean wants upper class boys to participate in a hanging before they graduate. He hinted he got the idea from one of the incoming students, of all things!"
"Uhhh..." I wasn't sure how to respond. "How about that." I didn't feel a need to claim credit. Just knowing I had put my mark on the process was enough. "I wish we could get parts of your fur, but I know it doesn't work that way."
"Oh!!" Gil's eyes glowed. "It's funny you'd mention that, I was just going to say. Barbara knows how all of us over here get really close, and she's going to send some of my pelt back here! Not very much, probably just one arm, and I imagine you'll each only get like one square inch of it. But it'll be me!"
I impulsively hugged him again. "That's great! And you know it doesn't matter how much it is. It'll just be nice knowing we have a little of you. We already do, really, from your teaching, but I mean physically."
Gil brushed aside a tear. "Thank you, that's so sweet. And..." He hesitated, looking now back and forth between Maverick and me with a serious face. "Listen, I was hoping to get a chance to tell you two. I'm sorry I had to come down so hard on you, that day. I mean, that's my job, but it's not easy for me to be like that."
I laughed. "It is when you get as mad as you were." I unconsciously rubbed my hand against my butt, almost feeling the swats again and pushing aside the memory.
Gil nodded and laughed. "Well, yeah." He looked at Maverick, who hadn't spoken yet. "So are we okay?"
Maverick blinked, seeming surprised at the question. He reached out and took my hand again, rubbing his palm against mine and lacing his fingers through mine. "Gil, that was... the best thing that's ever happened in my life." He looked to the side and locked eyes with me, while reaching out to give Gil a one-armed hug. Then he looked back at Gil and gave him a sincere smile.
Gil looked at him wide-eyed, momentarily speechless. "Ummm, okay then."
I was also looking at Maverick in surprise, feeling a sudden strong urge to throw my arms around Maverick and kiss him. I fought it down — it would be rude to take the attention away from Gil. I shook my head to clear it, then looked at Gil's roommate. "Brian, you're not going to be dorm parent by yourself, are you?"
"Oh, no! Like I could handle all you guys by myself?" He laughed. "Dennis is going to share with me."
"Great! He's still going to teach breath control, right?"
"Oh, sure! That's the thing about being a graduate, we all get busier as there get to be fewer of us."
Gil elbowed Brian playfully. "Tell him about those daily room inspections Dennis wants to do." He and Brian both laughed at the expressions on all the First Year faces around them. Gil confessed, "I just made that up."
Gil looked around at the now-thinning crowd, and back at Maverick and me. "You two better get pizza while there's any left."
We gradually oozed our way out of Gil's vicinity, and the crowd closed in behind us. I checked out the nearest table laden with now nearly-empty boxes. I waved my hand at the boxes and asked Maverick, "You in a pizza mood?"
Maverick looked distracted, and seemed to make up his mind about something just at that moment. He leaned closer and murmured very softly in my ear, "Hon, would it be okay if I invited Jack and Eric to spend the night with us?"
I did a double take, and knew how astonished I must have looked. Maverick had never invited anyone for an overnight, and I'd respected his privacy by never inviting anyone either — our overnights with Larry and Leo had been spent in their Second Year dorm room. My delay in answering might be taken by Maverick as discouragement, So I said, "Oh, sure! That'd be great!"
I watched as Maverick walked over to Jack, who had left the knot of people around Gil and was pouring himself a soft drink in a paper cup. Jack's startlement as Maverick leaned over and whispered something in his ear quickly changed to that same stunned expression I imagined was on my own face. Jack looked around the room quickly and spotted me. I smiled, shrugged to indicate Maverick was doing this on his own, and nodded that it was okay.
The four of us sat on the bed in our room, pretending to be absorbed in the movie on television, in which the hero had infiltrated an outlaw group of antisocial males who had banded together to evade the fur draft. Jack and Eric had sat on the bed together, propping their backs against the wall and stretching their legs across the width of the bed. Maverick had taken a place beside Jack, and looked up at me as I had started to sit on his other side. Maverick gave me a slight headshake and pointed to his left: he wanted me to sit on the far side of Eric. I gave Maverick a small nod and did so, but I wondered what was up. Maverick usually wanted me nearby when he had to deal with anyone else on a personal level.
As the movie's final credits rolled, I leaned forward slightly to look around Eric and Jack and watch Maverick. Mav was showing visible signs of tension — his palms pressed together to keep them from balling into fists, the slight clenching of his jaw muscles as he fought to keep from showing any signs of nervousness. I had to fight with myself to keep from getting up to... do something, whatever was needed to drain off Maverick's tension, but it was clear that Maverick wanted to handle this himself.
After a few moments of general uncomfortable silence, Maverick turned to Jack and said, "I know you don't trust me."
Jack blinked in surprise. Whatever he'd been expecting, it hadn't been anything quite so blunt. "Ummm... What do you mean?"
Maverick looked to the ceiling as if the words he wanted might be found there. "You've seen me... acting differently, lately, and you don't think it's for real." The reading of Jack's thoughts was a statement, not a question. He looked back at Jack. "I've seen those looks you give me."
Jack reddened, as if he hadn't intended to have been quite so obvious about it. "I'm sorry. I guess I'm just thinking... well, nobody changes that much, so fast."
Maverick leaned forward, smiling suddenly, as if he'd got the response he wanted. "But that's just it. I haven't changed. Everything that's made me what I am, for as long as I can remember, that hasn't changed at all. I'm going to be the best Hanging Boy ever. Everything I've done since long before I got here, and after I got here, and now, is pointed toward that. I'm... going about it differently, lately, because Wynn showed me a better way to get there. So what you see on the outside might look different. But it's really me, as much as anything you saw before was really me." He tapped his chest with both hands. "What's on the inside is written in stone. It's always been there, and it'll always be there. I want you to understand that much about me, because then you'll understand everything there is to know about me."
Jack's eyes were wide, and fixed on Maverick. In a tiny voice, Jack asked, "Why do you want me to understand you?"
Maverick was looking back just as fixedly. "Because I want us to be friends. I know you've been Wynn's friend since we all got here. I know Wynn would like it if you and I could be friends too, but this isn't about making Wynn happy." He reached down and took Jack's hand, and Jack, though obviously startled, didn't jerk it away. "It's just that I trust Wynn's judgment, and if you're Wynn's friend, that tells me you'd be a good friend to have."
Jack, sounding almost hypnotized, murmured, "Maybe you'd be a good friend too."
Maverick suddenly beamed at him. "Wynn! Want to show them what we've been working on?" He looked excitedly at Jack. "You'd be the first ones in our class to know about this. Keep it to yourselves, for now, okay?"
I shook myself out of my own trance. Of all the members of the First Year class, Maverick had known that Jack would be the first one I'd want to share this with. I jumped off the bed and pulled the hanging platform to the center of the room, under the noose, while Maverick got our equipment out of the dresser drawers, and Jack and Eric looked on, mystified. I pulled off my shirt, shorts and briefs automatically — whatever the circumstances, it was hard to imagine hanging any other way than naked.
Maverick looked at me, and saw I was already undressed. "Okay, you go first." He handed me the belt, and I fastened it around my waist. Maverick grunted as he lifted the first weight and hung it on the belt next to my hip. Eric, startled out of his usual silence, blurted, "What in the hell are you guys doing?"
Maverick continued hanging weights on my belt. "We're working on strengthening our neck muscles. We're both up to forty pounds now. The goal is to handle a hundred fifty extra pounds in about another month."
Jack shook his head. "Supposedly that doesn't really help. They've found that just holding your own body weight is enough to condition the muscles."
"Not for what we're going to do." I went on to explain.
Sleep released me for a moment, and I opened my eyes in the darkened room. I stifled a giggle as I realized my dream of floating on the ocean was probably caused by the slow rise and fall of Eric's chest underneath my head. I felt the soft rubbing of Maverick's hip against my own, as Maverick lay beside me on the bed on top of Jack. Maverick's head was turned toward me, and presently I saw his eyes open to squint at me. I smiled at my roommate and mouthed "Thank you."
Maverick returned my sleepy smile, and whispered, "Love you."
I heard Jack's breathing change, and knew he had awakened. Jack mumbled, "What's up?"
Moving as little as possible, I leaned over and kissed Jack, Maverick moving his head aside to give me room. "Shhh, 'S nothing. Sorry. Don't wake Eric."
Eric raised his arm and put his hand behind my head, pulling me more snugly against him. I gave a short laugh. "Guess we're all awake now."
I felt Maverick's shoulder rub mine. "Want to switch?"
I smiled. "Sure." I lifted myself off of Eric to let Maverick slide over onto him, then climbed over Maverick and onto Jack, wrapping my arms around him and slipping my right leg between Jack's. I looked down at Jack, smiling. "Missed you."
Jack said softly, "Me too," and pulled my head down onto his for a long, soft kiss.